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50?

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Here’s something I came up with last month for my 50th birthday. Sung to the tune of Alice Cooper’s, “Eighteen”.

Spots form on my face and hands
Wrinkles form around my eyes
I’m outside without any pants
It’s easier to water the plants

I’m fifty
And I forgot what I want
Fifty
I just forgot what I want
Fifty
I think I gotta pee
I better get out of this bed
I’ll go places without my meds
Oh yeah

I still got my driver’s license and a big ass car
Took Fifty years to get this far
Don’t always remember what I was talkin’ about
I hear you, you don’t have to shout
‘Cause I’m Fifty
I get confused every day
Fifty
Huh? What did you say?
Fifty
I think I’m in the way

Spots form on my face and my hands
Wrinkles form around my eyes
I’m in the middle
The middle of the road
My blinker’s on and I don’t care
I’m Fifty and I’m achy
Yes I’m achy
Oh I’m achy
Cranky
Achy
Cranky
Fifty!
Fifty!
Fifty!
Fifty and I’m cranky!

Now get off my lawn!

Written by David A. Ufer

June 16, 2014 at 4:15 pm

Posted in Eyes, Faces, Health, Me, Music

Tagged with , , , , , , ,

The Birthday Trip

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The Big 5-0, or to put it in more recent terminology, Fiddy.

In just a few weeks I’ll hit the half-century mark. Wow, how did this happen?! I don’t feel my age, although there are some days I’ll admit to some aches and pains but I attribute them to working out in the gym, pushing my physical self to the limits my mental self says I should still be able to achieve. I may have lost a step or two on the running track but I’m still able to run a respectable 5K and might just be in better overall shape than I was in high school.

At any rate, I’ll be celebrating my 50th birthday traipsing around, down and in the Grand Canyon. The American Southwest has been an item on my bucket list for quite a while and this year is the year I cross that one off the list!

I’m very much looking forward to visiting the Grand Canyon, Bryce Canyon, Four Corners in New Mexico and the gorgeous Sedona, AZ areas as well as a ride on some of Rt. 66 and wherever else the desert winds may take me.

In the meantime, the shopping and planning phases are keeping me occupied and excited.

See you on down the road!

Written by David A. Ufer

April 21, 2014 at 6:58 am

Posted in Health, Me, Nature

Anclote Key

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The breeze blows in our faces

As the boat cuts through the Gulf

A dolphin’s fin breaks the surface

Attracted to the hum of the engines

The sun is warm against our skin

As the aroma of coconut wafts by

The water is cool but not cold

Friends laugh and joke

As kids and dogs frolic on the beach

Sunscreen and cocktails, surf and sand

Welcome to Anclote Key

Written by David A. Ufer

May 20, 2013 at 8:58 am

Begin As You Mean To Go On

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Image Courtesy of http://thenextweb.com

Image Courtesy of http://thenextweb.com

She stood there, smiling

He stood there, anxious

She recognized him immediately

They hugged, greeted each other

Her sweet, delicate perfume tantalized him

He drew in a deep breath

Held it in his lungs,

Filled himself with her scent

The music played, too loudly to speak

They found a table in the back

She had such beautiful brown eyes

An impossibly radiant smile

And a waterfall of chestnut curls

Cascading over delicate features

Her comely, demure nature

Pulled him in,

Heightened his desire for her

An occasional, gentle touch

Set his body abuzz with excitement

He wanted more

They talked through the night

It was easy, effortless

Like they had known each other

For weeks, months even

They walked to her car

Talked a bit more,

And shared a goodnight hug

He held her as long as he dared

The night ended far too soon

She left him with a memory

And hope

Written by David A. Ufer

March 11, 2013 at 7:48 am

Once More Unto the Breach, Dear Friends, Once More;

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One door closes and another one opens.

Yep, we’ve all heard that cliche but maybe there is a reason why certain phrases are used so much that they enter cliche status. Sure, it’s an easy way to get our point across when we are trying to comfort a friend or even ourselves, but there must also be some truth behind them.

Time and again I’ve had doors close on me; sometimes slammed right in my face! And yet each time, that proverbial second portal always presented itself, often times when I wasn’t even looking for it. I’ve never been one to shy away from an adventure; the thrill, excitement and yes, uncertainty of the unknown wraps itself around me and pulls me closer into its sensuous grasp. I have sometimes stumbled through only to be met with a dead end or I have fallen into the abyss, losing myself and who I was while I fell.  This time I have been gently coaxed through a doorway barely five feet high.

Whatever lies beyond that delicate entry, I will face it head-on, determined and open-armed; it’s the only way I know.

Written by David A. Ufer

March 4, 2013 at 6:53 am

Why?

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why-us

That’s the big question, isn’t it?

Why were we born? Why do we do the things we do? Why do people cycle in and out of our lives? Why do people have to die?

There are a lot of “why’s?” in our lives and sometimes we may never know the answers.

I do a lot of wondering about the people I have met in my life and the women I have dated, especially the relationships that didn’t work out. Why did I have to go through those times? Why did I do the things that caused them pain and why did I have to go through the times that caused me pain?

If we are supposed to learn from those moments and become better people because of them, why can’t we just have that knowledge ahead of time and spare everyone the pain and upset? Why must we be taught through such emotional experiences? And why are we sometimes meant to learn the same lesson repeatedly? What is it about us that we can’t learn from our mistakes the first time we make them and not repeat our foolish ways?

Let’s hope we’ve all learned enough lessons to make us smarter and more capable of making only good decisions from now on.

Written by David A. Ufer

February 25, 2013 at 6:44 am

Posted in Friends, Health, Me

The Pursuit to be Rebuilt and Reborn

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“I went down into the desert city
Just tryin’ so hard to shed my skin
I crawled deep into some kind of darkness
Lookin’ to burn out every trace of who I’d been”

Living Proof by Bruce Springsteen

Image courtesy of bozaround.com

Image courtesy of bozaround.com

There’s something about the American Southwest, and the desert in particular, that has had a hold on me for quite some time. My bucket list includes a trip to the desert and this year may just be the year I do it. There’s a lot of this country I haven’t seen and it’s time I got around to it. The Grand Canyon, Death Valley and maybe Las Vegas will be on the agenda this year. My friends are welcome to come along, so if you are reading this and are my friend, give me a shout and let’s get planning!

Written by David A. Ufer

February 11, 2013 at 6:36 am